Chapter 26: Lin Is Just Lin

In the guild hall, Kazuma Sato stroked his chin and spoke up, "Come to think of it, I still don't know Kobayashi-senpai's full name."

His remark drew the attention of those around him.

"Why are you bringing that up all of a sudden? Is there a problem?" Darkness asked, looking concerned and clearly curious. "What's wrong with Kobayashi's name? Did he hide his real name?"

"Well... how should I put it? It just feels a bit wrong that after spending so much time together, I still don't know his full name." Kazuma, oblivious to her reaction, voiced his concern. He believed that knowing someone's name was the bare minimum of politeness when interacting with others.

"Does it really matter what his name is?" Megumin seemed indifferent. After all, her own name was considered quite bizarre by others, and even if she didn't mind, she was often teased for it.

"That's not the point!" Kazuma felt he couldn't get through to them, so he turned to the party's archpriest. "Hey, Aqua, you should know what Kobayashi-senpai's name is, right?"

"Hmm? What's that?" Aqua’s mouth was stuffed with food, making her look like a goofy hamster, with no trace of a goddess's dignity.

Kazuma looked slightly disgusted but repeated, "The name! The name! I'm asking you what Kobayashi-senpai's name is!"

"I don't know."

"Huh?!"

The answer was so blunt that Kazuma couldn't accept it. "Aren't you 'that' person? How could you not know?"

"'That' person? What are you talking about! I don't know, so I don't know! What do you expect me to do about it?"

"You really are..."

Aqua is a goddess. Before Kazuma brought her down to the mortal realm, she was the one handling the reincarnations for those who died. It should have been impossible for her not to know Kobayashi's name... Wait. He remembered the first time he met Kobayashi-senpai; when Kobayashi was angry, Aqua acted as if she had no idea who he was. Had she already forgotten him back then?!

"You really are a hopeless idiot." Kazuma's disdain deepened.

This, in turn, annoyed Aqua, who retorted loudly, "How could I possibly remember everyone! Do you know how many people I have to process in a single day? It would be exhausting to remember them one by one!"

In truth, Aqua had it tough; who else was to blame but the consistently high mortality rate in Japan? Realizing this, Kazuma felt a twinge of apology.

Since Aqua didn't know, he decided to ask other adventurers. He started with Dust. He had been mentored by Kobayashi-senpai, so they were close and he should know.

...

"You're asking about Kobayashi's name? I don't know."

"Eh?"

"Hey, Kobayashi is just Kobayashi. Names and stuff, it really doesn't matter... *hic!*"

Forget it, he was useless too. Kazuma looked at the drunken Dust and realized his mind was clouded; it was highly likely he couldn't remember, or perhaps he truly didn't know.

He went to ask others. "Kobayashi? No idea."

"Well, he's always been a solo player, he rarely interacts with people."

"Kobayashi is just Kobayashi. Names don't really matter, do they?"

The adventurers all said much the same thing. Kazuma couldn't tell if Kobayashi's relationship with the guild members was good or bad. If it were bad, they wouldn't all recognize him; if it were good, you'd think someone would know his name.

"Why not ask the receptionist?" Seeing Kazuma failing to get answers, one adventurer kindly suggested, "Adventurers have to leave their names on record to take quests. You should go ask there."

"Right, I completely forgot about that!" Kazuma slapped his palm.

The guild kept personal information on adventurers to organize records and post quests. While others couldn't ask, members of the same party should be fine. He walked up to the reception desk.

"How can I help you?"

"Luna-san, I'd like to check the adventure logs of my party member, Kobayashi."

"Kobayashi's adventure logs? Certainly, please wait a moment."

Just as he thought, there were no restrictions between party members. He was about to find out Kobayashi-senpai's name! A sense of accomplishment at uncovering a mystery surged within him.

*Thump.*

A thick stack of quest sheets was placed on the counter, reaching almost to his chest!

"These are all of Kobayashi's adventure records."

"This many?"

"Yes! Thanks to Kobayashi, this town hasn't been troubled by monsters for quite some time. I have to say, he's the most diligent adventurer I've ever seen in Axel!" Luna spoke highly of him.

"Oh, is that so." Kazuma wasn't in the mood to evaluate Kobayashi's diligence; he just wanted to know the name! He hurriedly flipped through them.

Kobayashi, Kobayashi, Kobayashi...

"————!"

Every single quest sheet just said "Kobayashi." There was no full name at all! How could this be?

Kazuma held his head in his hands and shouted, "Why can't I find it? Does Kobayashi-senpai not have a full name?!!!"

"Why wouldn't I have a full name?" Kobayashi's voice came from beside him.

"Kobayashi-senpai?"

"What, are you that curious about my name?"

"Yes! Please tell me your name, Kobayashi-senpai!"

"To be so interested in a man's name... if I didn't know you were just as obsessed with older sisters as I am, I'd definitely keep my distance. Fine, I'll tell you."

"Yeah, yeah!" Kazuma's eyes lit up. This was the first time he'd felt such excitement at the prospect of a secret being revealed.

"My name is Kobayashi—"

*Screech—*

A sharp, grating sound rang out abruptly in the slightly noisy guild, startling everyone and drowning out Kobayashi’s voice, leaving Kazuma unable to hear what he had said. He turned around angrily to find the source.

He discovered that Darkness was arm-wrestling with someone, and the force she was exerting caused the table to slide across the floor, creating that piercing noise, with a crowd gathered around to watch.

"Darkness, watch it!"

Unfortunately, the knight, surrounded by the crowd, couldn't hear him.

Kazuma shook his head in frustration and turned back to ask, "Sorry, Darkness was too loud. I didn't hear you. Could you say it again, Kobayashi-senpai?"

"Sure. My name is Kobayashi—"

*Splash—*

A stream of water descended from the sky, soaking Kazuma into a drowned rat, and naturally, he missed the answer again. There was only one person who would play with water in the guild.

"A-Q-U-A!!!"

Kazuma was boiling with rage. Watching the idiotic goddess spraying water all over the hall using her party tricks, he wanted to walk over and slap her, but he held back.

The most important thing right now was Kobayashi-senpai's name. The rest could wait.

"Kobayashi-senpai..."

"Alright, alright, I'll tell you. Don't look at me with those pathetic eyes; it's honestly a bit gross."

Even though he was called gross, he endured it.

"Listen up, my name is Kobayashi—"

"Huh?! I told you not to call me a brain-damaged, chuunibyou mage from the Crimson Demon Clan! Call me Phoenix! Are you looking for trouble?! Fine, I accept! My family motto is to never back down from a fight! If you say my brain is damaged, then I'll show you just how damaged it can be!"

For some reason, Megumin suddenly snapped, drawing Kazuma's attention. She raised her staff, preparing to cast magic, causing the adventurers in the guild to scatter and flee.

"W-wait... Megumin?!"

"—Explosion... Gaah?!"

At the last second, Kobayashi ran over at high speed and used *Drain Touch* to absorb all of Megumin's mana. While it didn't blow up the guild, the commotion had already sent the place into chaos. After Kobayashi and Megumin offered endless apologies and paid hefty damages, the incident was finally quelled.

...

Nighttime.

An exhausted Kobayashi and Kazuma went to the public bath to clean up.

"That stupid little brat is absolutely terrible! When we get back, Kobayashi-senpai must give her a good lecture!"

"Don't say that, she was insulted, after all."

"That doesn't mean she can just go around casting Explosion magic!"

"Alright, alright. No one getting hurt is the best possible outcome. Anyway, I'm heading in. You hurry up and get in, too."

"I'll be right there."

Kobayashi went in first, and Kazuma hurried to change. Although Megumin had been provoked, he couldn't help but feel angry; it was all because of her outburst that he hadn't heard Kobayashi-senpai's name.

He tidied up his discarded clothes and placed them in the locker next to Kobayashi's. Suddenly, a card caught his eye.

—An Adventurer Card?!

Right! The adventurer card would definitely show his full name! That was common sense, how could he have forgotten?

But was it wrong to touch someone else's personal belongings? No, no, it was just to check a name, it should be fine! ...Right? But he was so curious, what should he do?

Kazuma was locked in an internal struggle, feeling incredibly conflicted. In the end, he couldn't resist his curiosity. Well, Kobayashi-senpai wasn't the type to hold a grudge, so he would just apologize later.

Feeling guilty, he looked left and right to make sure no one was coming, then reached into Kobayashi's laundry basket.

...

"Sato-kun! Aren't you done yet?!"

"————!!!"

Kazuma was startled. The sudden call stopped his heart for a second. He forced his hand over his thumping chest and covered his mouth to stifle a scream. After a second, he lowered his voice and tried to sound calm.

"I'm just organizing my clothes!"

"Alright, hurry up!"

"Coming!"

Answering loudly, he calmed his racing heart and reached back into the basket. Almost there! Just a little bit more! Finally... he would finally know Kobayashi-senpai's name!

With an excited heart and trembling hands, he cast "Steal."

A flash of light, and a card was pinched between his index and middle fingers. He could swear he hadn't been this cautious even when he was "rewarding" himself secretly back at the inn! But it was all worth it!

It was like the satisfaction of a thief stealing a prized treasure after great hardship, or a detective reaching the end of a mystery. Satisfaction! That was the only word for it.

He finally... finally...

As he flipped over Kobayashi's adventurer card, which had been facing away from him, and paused in mid-air, the triumphant, wild grin on Kazuma's face froze as he looked at the name column.

A long silence followed.

He slammed the card onto the bathroom floor, unable to stop himself from roaring—

"Are you kidding me!!!"

"Why is there a mosaic on it?!!!"