Chapter Three: Love at First Sight

Shengyao knew he had fallen in love. He’d been struck at first sight by a girl he’d only just met. Yet nothing about their encounter could be called romantic—the date was Qingming, the location a cemetery. No matter how he looked at it, the timing and place were all wrong.

He had impulsively grabbed her hand, introduced himself, and she had responded with good grace. But what next? They couldn’t just stand there in awkward silence. He needed to say something!

“Are you here to pay your respects?” The words slipped out of Shengyao’s blank mind before he could stop them, and he immediately wanted to slap himself.

A trace of sorrow crossed Bai Xiao’s face as she answered softly, “Yes.”

Her gaze turned to the gravestone, locking eyes with the young woman in the photograph.

Shengyao ought to follow the thread of conversation, ask which relative of hers was buried here, offer the customary words of condolence, then gently steer their talk to lighter matters. That way, he might learn more about Bai Xiao’s family, and share something about his own. After that…

But as Shengyao followed Bai Xiao’s line of sight to the gravestone, all his thoughts and plans vanished like smoke.

The nearly identical faces and the same name, inscribed in black, were like a thorn lodged in his throat. His heart pounded uncontrollably—he couldn’t tell if it was excitement or dread.

Before he could collect his thoughts, Bai Xiao composed herself, turned, and smiled at him. She glanced at the gravestone before Shengyao and read the inscription. “Are you here to pay respects, too? Is this your… grandparents?”

Shengyao snapped back to his senses, nodding hastily and spilling the story without pause. “Yes, my grandparents. My grandfather died before I was born, and my grandmother passed away before I started school. Honestly, I barely remember them; my parents always brought me here when I was little…”

Today, on a whim, he’d come alone—and met Bai Xiao.

As though something unseen had guided him here, drawing him to this meeting.

Shengyao was startled by his own thoughts. He’d never known himself to be so romantic, to entertain such girlish daydreams.

“Did you come alone today?” Bai Xiao asked.

Shengyao nodded. “You came alone too?”

“Yes.” Her tone was gentle and tinged with sadness. She looked back at the gravestone, her eyes calm yet sorrowful.

Seeing Bai Xiao like this stirred something strange in Shengyao’s heart.

They were both alone at the cemetery, but for him, it was a passing whim. For Bai Xiao, it seemed different—perhaps she could only come alone…

He clenched his hand, wanting to do something, to draw her close and comfort her. He forced himself to hold back that impulse.

But another urge rose, impossible to suppress.

“This is… your…” Shengyao glanced at the gravestone, at the woman’s photograph, then back at Bai Xiao.

She gave him a faint smile, sidestepping his question.

“Well, I should get going,” she said suddenly, her gaze falling to her arm.

Shengyao realized he was still holding her hand. Embarrassed, he released her at once. “Sorry.”

His empty hand dropped, restless and longing to hold hers again. But he couldn’t keep making the same blunders. To stop himself from doing something foolish, he tucked his hand behind his back and clenched his fist.

He could still feel the chill of Bai Xiao’s hand in his palm.

“It’s all right.” Bai Xiao withdrew her hand and rested her other hand on her arm, where he had been holding her.

“You…” Shengyao searched desperately for a topic. “How did you get here? By shuttle bus? I was about to leave as well. Shall we walk to the parking lot together?”

Bai Xiao shook her head with a gentle smile. “I live nearby. I’ll just walk home.”

Shengyao was surprised—and then disappointed. But he quickly rallied. “Let me walk you, then!”

He saw a flicker of hesitation on Bai Xiao’s face and hurried to explain, “No, no! I’m not that kind of person! I just…”

She laughed softly. “I know. You don’t have to be so nervous. I don’t think you’re a bad person.”

Shengyao breathed a sigh of relief, sweating from anxiety.

“I’ll be off, you don’t need to see me out.” She paused, looked at him deeply, and said in a gentle voice, “Goodbye…” Then she turned away.

Shengyao’s heart gave a jolt. He swallowed, reached out instinctively, but grasped only empty air.

Bai Xiao emerged from the swirling smoke of burnt offerings, only to disappear back into it.

Shengyao’s vision was obscured by the smoke as he searched the surroundings.

All around were gravestones and people, smoke drifting in waves, and the sound of weeping rising and falling, as if the whole world were sunk in sorrow.

He couldn’t spot Bai Xiao among the unfamiliar faces. Crestfallen, he lowered his head.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Bai Xiao’s grave.

The woman’s photograph drew all his attention, and he found himself crouching before the tombstone, gazing into the woman’s eyes.

“You’re called Bai Xiao too…” he murmured, staring at that woman with the same name, his fingers gently tracing her face in the photo.

Only then did he notice the strange, sticky grayish substance smeared on his fingers. Some had transferred to the photo.

Flustered, he quickly wiped the stain off with his other hand, checked the photo, then glanced at his hand.

He had been holding Bai Xiao’s hand for so long just now…

Not only had he grabbed her so rudely, but his hands were dirty as well.

Regretful, Shengyao cleaned his hand and looked at the gravestone once more.

“I’m sorry…” he murmured.

As the words left his mouth, a sharp pain struck his heart, as though pierced by a sword—the black letters of the name cleaving through his chest and shattering his heart.

He bent double, clutching his chest, struggling to breathe.

After a long moment, he recovered.

“Are you all right?” a voice asked nearby.

Shengyao waved it off and stood. “I’m fine.”

“Did you take the shuttle bus here too? From around Anyang Community?” a kindly aunt inquired.

Shengyao turned, recognized her, and replied, “Yes, that’s the one.”

He remembered the bus route stopped by Anyang Community, picking up a few passengers—this aunt among them.

“It’s almost time; the bus will leave soon,” she reminded him.

“Thank you.” Shengyao thanked her and walked with her toward the cemetery entrance.

The aunt chatted the whole way, comforting him: “…It’s always like this at the cemetery, makes people feel low. But think about it—though family are gone, there are still others, and you’re alive and well. That should bring some comfort. Most important is to live well, so those who’ve passed can rest easy, right?”

Shengyao looked at the people around him, all with similarly sorrowful faces, busy with similar rituals. In that moment, they seemed like a great family, sharing grief and responsibility.

“What if… there aren’t any other relatives?” Shengyao suddenly asked.

Wasn’t that what Bai Xiao’s expression and tone suggested?

He thought of this as the names on his grandparents’ gravestone floated through his mind.

He slowed his steps.

The aunt hesitated. “Well, then there must be friends, right? Colleagues, classmates… someone you’re close with?”

Shengyao said nothing, lips pressed tightly, his gaze heavy.

He had the feeling Bai Xiao had no such person. The loneliness she carried was overwhelming. She must have been alone for a long time…

The aunt could only offer a dry consolation: “Don’t dwell on it, you’re still so young.” She looked at him with sympathy.

The shuttle bus stood waiting, its door open, the driver smoking outside. Few people had boarded yet. Shengyao took his usual seat in the front while the aunt went to the back.

Soon, more passengers filled the bus, and departure time arrived.

As the bus set off, forming a queue with the other vehicles, the elderly man beside Shengyao, who had sat stiffly for twenty minutes as if on pins and needles, suddenly spoke: “Young man, whose grave did you visit?”

Shengyao paused, then replied, “My grandparents’.”

“Oh…” The old man responded awkwardly, fell silent, then asked, “You went alone?”

“Yes,” Shengyao answered, recalling Bai Xiao’s expression.

“What about your parents?” The old man observed him closely.

Shengyao looked at him, suddenly sensing something amiss.

He realized the shuttle was unusually quiet. The elderly passengers, who had been as lively as schoolchildren earlier, now sat in mournful silence, their eyes occasionally drifting toward him.

He could feel the weight of their stares, all as substantial as the old man’s beside him. Uncomfortable, he shifted in his seat.

“They didn’t come,” he replied.

But as he spoke, he thought of the black names on his grandparents’ gravestone.

He shifted again, more noticeably.

“I see,” the old man said, after a pause. “My condolences.”

Shengyao forced a smile. “Thank you. But my grandparents passed away a long time ago.”

He turned to the window, signaling the conversation was over.

The gloomy sky made a perfect backdrop for his reflection in the glass—confused, but not sorrowful.

In the window, he caught a glimpse of Bai Xiao’s profile. He knew it was just his imagination.

Bai Xiao.

She was beautiful, especially when she smiled.

To his surprise, his own reflection broke into an involuntary smile.

But that smile was soon drowned in worry.

He hadn’t even managed to ask for Bai Xiao’s contact information before she left in a hurry. He must have frightened her. Anyone would be startled to be approached like that in a cemetery—he must have seemed a creep. Maybe “Bai Xiao” was a fake name, given just to get rid of him…

A thousand thoughts flickered through his mind, but he dismissed them all.

She had to be Bai Xiao.

She hadn’t lied when she introduced herself with a smile.

He hadn’t frightened her.

She… must have liked him too…

Otherwise, why would she have spoken to him so kindly?

Shengyao smiled again.

In the window, only two reflections were real: himself grinning foolishly, and the old man at his side. The old man glanced over, seemed startled by the smile, and quickly turned away, even shifting his body to face the other direction.

Shengyao quickly composed himself.

He had to remain calm. Next time he saw Bai Xiao, he couldn’t mess things up again.

But then it hit him—would there even be a next time? Where could he find her? All he knew was her name and that a relative named Bai Xiao was buried in Longevity Garden, and she lived nearby…

He remembered her bittersweet smile, and his heart sank.

…

Chen Jin was one of the security staff at Longevity Garden Cemetery. Most days were quiet, except for Qingming and the Winter Solstice, when things got busy. This year, he was on duty for Qingming. His colleague, Old Xu, was still in charge of the parking lot as usual; his peer Xiao Jin was stationed at the gate, guiding visitors until his voice grew hoarse after a couple of days. Chen Jin and three others were assigned to patrol the burial grounds, clocking over ten thousand steps each day.

Because he was older and more experienced, Chen Jin chose the quietest section: the Longevity Area, leaving the traditional grounds, the columbarium, and the family rest area to his younger colleagues.

The so-called Longevity Area was the cemetery’s high-end section, with its own parking lot and a special western gate. Its semi-enclosed landscaping set it apart from the traditional area, making it peaceful and solemn. Each grave here was a mound with a spacious area for visitors, each headstone unique, many with trees, flowers, or decorative sculptures according to the deceased’s wishes or their family’s intent.

The Longevity Area covered as much ground as the rest of the cemetery but held far fewer graves and received fewer visitors, so Chen Jin’s duties were almost effortless.

Compared to the bustle of the traditional section during Qingming, this place was a sanctuary.

But in the past few days, a certain uninvited guest had disturbed Chen Jin’s sanctuary.